Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Polygamy and Polyamory

Polygamy marriage is definitely not something new. Muslims in this country can marry up to 4 wives and China Emperor used to have thousands of concubine with him. So, is polygamy actually morally correct and should be practiced? I stumble upon these articles posted by my friend on Facebook and I would like to share with you guys.


Loving many=Loving more
A practical solution?
A wholesome affair

According to these articles, polyamory relationships do not only revolves around sex which many though they were. It is something more and they emphasize on how they desire love and care from others as well. Basically, they are just saying polyamory is not a form a lust but something more.

An Excuse or The Truth?

Infidelity happens in a lot of monogamy relationship which is true and this proves that humans can love more than a person. There is always a fine line between lust and love. Wanting love from more than one person? Wanting more than one person to care for you? No matter how nicely you put it, it still sounds like lust to me. Whoever said that lust is only sexual? These people just lust for love and care and I definitely refused to believe if there is no sexual relationship involved.


Open Relationship

I totally believed in open relationship. An open relationship is where the dating couple have the freedom to date other people and both of them are aware of it. But in the end, they come back to each other. This gives them the freedom to choose other partners before finally settling down. I believed that this is actually a good choice for certain people as they will be able to know what they want. Sounds too good to be true for certain people out there? But these sort of relationship take place more often than you think. Where you think "fuddy" comes from? If you do not know what it means then google it. Lazy to explain.

These people knows that they are prone to infidelity and hence choose to be totally open about it. There are certain rules and guidelines in maintaining such relationship which can be determined by themselves. I admired these kind of straight-forwardness but unfortunately, I don't think it is practical at all.

Polygamy Marriage

We had a lot of the examples here in Malaysia. I do not need to elaborate on this, do I? To me, polygamy is a very sexist matter. Men are allowed to have more than 1 wife but women are not allowed to have more than 1 husband. This indirectly implies that men have higher tendency to stray and hence had to cook up some bullshit excuse of getting another wife. Why do we actually need to have another wife? Another one to care for you? Another one to love you? Another one to take care of your family? Or another one to simply have sex with?

According to this article, a child who grows in a polygamy family will have more love, care, more role model to choose from and also education. Do you guys sense anything funny? Who the hell will marry another wife for this bloody reason? When you realized your son is a complete retard, then will you marry a world class lecturer just for it? Or do you propose to the lecturer by saying "I wanna marry you so you can help my son to be not so retard". If anyone accept such proposal, the son will be finished as she is a retard as well.

My Views

I believed in open relationship but I don't believe in polygamy marriage. It is not a matter to be morally or politically correct or not. It is just a simple gesture of honoring the one you love by preserving certain privileges for them. If you can't settle down, then why get marry? Marriage is not a game but a commitment to me. If you can't commit then don't get started.

Although I believed in open relationship but I don't practiced them. It is not because I'm trying to be morally correct but it is a simple matter of ego. I would definitely not share with anyone the love of my life and if that happens, I rather remain single. Who could imagine having someone to share your happiness? We should spread happiness around but not by that mean. Polygamory might mean giving chances to each and everyone to choose carefully before settling down. I for one would only get into a relationship with someone I think I could settle down with not as an option. We came to the age where love is not the most important criteria in getting in a relationship. The financial background, the future stability and qualities of a person plays an important role too. Why? Because love is blind and it is very difficult to choose based on that as it would not guarantee the future.

What I do not understand is why certain people would go to the extend of getting more than 1 wives if they know they can't settle down? Religious purpose? Self consciousness? Pressure from parents? What's the point of getting married if we could not reserve certain privileges to ourselves? Although the articles said the child could grow up with much more advantages but it didn't said those child would grow up to be more successful than the rest? They could have more role models to choose from? Choose what? Which retarded "moms" that willing to share their husbands to follow? The dad who couldn't keep his pants up? Wow, I can see a good selection of role models here.


Yes, if you do not plan to settle down yet, it is good to have an open relationship and I would not discriminate you for that. I think it is good to have fun when you are still able to "get it up". In fact, that's why we have all those kinky threesome, foursome or gang bang right? But would it be sensible to get in a committed relationship and still strays around? If you can't commit then why commit at all? What's your view? Sorry for being away from the blogging scene awhile. Was busy and moodless to do anything.

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