Saturday, December 12, 2009

Cursing And Its Advantages

WARNING: This post contains various terms not suitable for minor or the faint hearted
I've been well known as a serial curser. It's hard to even imagine a day without me spewing any foul words such as "fuck" or anything similar to that. I've been endlessly reminded how foul I sound and how unpleasant my friends felt being around me. Well, I guess it's a bit selfish of me not to consider much about their feelings but do I really need to care when they don't care much about mine. Hmmm....I wonder.

Back then in our younger days, we felt that it is cool to curse due to the continuous influence of Hong Kong movies and also Hollywood movies. For God's sake, watch some Malay movies then your kids would not think that way. I guess many can feel that seeing a young boy as young as 9 years old spewing out words like Tiu Nia Mah or Fuck, we would often laugh as they remind us of our younger self and how stupid they look instead of looking cool.

To me, cursing is more of a form of language art rather than meaningless rants. The small kids did not know how to use it and that's why they look stupid and sound stupid. Some people might think that I too look stupid when I curse but mind you, you are the one who misunderstood about my art and concept of cursing. There are many ways of cursing in an appropriate way and many will agree to the several advantages that I'm soon gonna list out. If some of you are rather uncomfortable with curse words, I recommend you to stop reading right now and do something more worthwhile like watching Teletubbies.

1. It properly portray stages of emotion
When you are angry, how do you tell some one off? There might be several ways of communicating nicely to that person but then how often do you succeed? Some idiots just won't get it and they will never will because of the things you said doesn't properly portrays your feelings. If you say you wanna be good and do not wanna offend that particular person, then go ahead and let him continue offending you. If you care for them, doesn't mean they will care for you. Take for example, this situation.

A guy keeps on teasing and annoying you while you are handling something very important way. How will you respond?
The Holy Angel who is destined for Heaven(HA)
Please do not disturb me. I'm handling something important and I would like some private time alone to concentrate. Would you be so kind not to bother with me awhile? I will get back to you after I'm done.
Most Likely Consequence
Since, that guy is such an annoying idiot, I reckon he will linger awhile more just to pissed you off may be by saying "Wah, you so hardworking meh?" or "Haiya, don't pretend pretend la..."

Me
KNNBCCB...You fucking blind cannot see me busy ah? Fuck off before I rip your fucking balls off your nut sack. Fucking brainless idiot.
Most Likely Consequence
Shut up and run off while guarding his balls. Will not ever disturb me anymore although it might ruin the relationship. Who needs a friend who is such a retard?

2. To make something lame to sound so much better.
To me, foul words are the most bombastic words ever. It could make a lame sounding sentence to a very convincing and interesting statement. Let me ask you guys this, who usually got your attention the most be it the most annoying or most interesting? A curser or a good mouthed goodie? The answer is always the one who curse. Vulgar words as a much needed exaggeration at times to make things simply goes your way. This is another case study to prove my point.

Coming out with an excuse of being late. Idea courtesy of Butterfly.
H.A
Sorry guys, I was stuck in the traffic jam. Real sorry.
Most Likely Consequence
They would just either brush it as an excuse and ignore it. They might accept it but none will pay attention to it.

Me
CB...The traffic damn fucking jam just now. Dunno why the fuck no traffic light also so bloody jam. Fucking hate this shit man...
Most Likely Consequence
The rest of the guys join in and curse the traffic even though it never really did happen. They are not only convinced, they are INTO it. Notice that there is no apology needed for this statement as it doesn't sounds like your fault anymore.

3. A form of catalyst to enhance the humor of a reaction, situation or conversation
This is a trick usually used by many film makers especially Singapore's Jack Neo. He's is well known for instilling Hokkien foul words in order to make his movies way much funnier. You guys got to admit you can't just stop laughing at all the jokes regardless how foul they seem. Even in a conversation, the usage of foul words could greatly enhance the conversation value. Admit it guys, those who had been my friend, which one of you haven't laugh at me using certain vulgar words to make my point or reaction? I had several uni mates laughing their monkey ass off every time uses the word KNN. Take for example, how you guys would react to this statement.

A: Dude, you saw that hot chick over there? I just bang her last night. *grins*
H.A
Wow, she's a fine deal. Although I do not agree to such a vulgar topic but I think you have a reason to be happy.
Most Likely Consequence
Your friend thinking you might be gay.

Me
WHAT THE FUCK??? How come such a fuck face like yours can get such a hot chick? Is she fucking blind or drunk during that time? Dude, you got to fucking pray to the God Of Sex for this bounty or you'll be cursed never to get laid again.
Most Likely Consequence
The conversation gets more detailed into how he got lucky and the conversation is always filled with spice especially when you mentioned how his fucked up face could get so lucky. He will elaborate on how they meet and how the sparks started. Why is this important? So, you will know the trick of getting such chick in the future, you dumbass.

4. Cursing a good way of releasing stress
Let's be honest. As an adult, I bet there are surely several times where you had no other choice to simply blurt out a few foul language either intentionally or unintentionally. I believe cursing actually helps us to release stress. Why do we sometimes could not control ourselves but to curse? Our mental stress is building up which affects our emotion and also rationality hence we would not be able to control our actions anymore. When you are unable to contain certain emotions such as happiness, sadness or even anger, we often unconsciously let our actions took control. When we were surprised, we yelled and scream even before we knew it. We cry when we are sad. Do all these actually had gone through rational consideration? The answer is no because that's the way our mind and body letting out excessive emotion outburst. Tell me which of these situations below would make you feel better. Let's consider this.

A guy cheats you with another girl who happens to be your best friend.
H.A
It's fine. *sobs* They are *sobs* in love and* I should *sobs* give them *sobs* my blessings. *sobs*
or
I'm very disappointed in the both of you. I wanna express my anger over here by words and not action. You both will receive divine punishment. Someday.
Most Likely Consequence
They are not entirely disturbed at all and won't give a nut shit about you.

Me(In this case, a girl)
FUCK YOU TWO-TIMING BASTARD. I WISH YOU AND THAT WHORE WILL BLOODY ROT IN HELL. IF SHE'S WILLING TO ACCEPT A DICKHEAD LIKE YOU, WHO KNOWS WHAT OTHER THINGS HAD GONE THROUGH HER FUCKING HOLE
Most Likely Consequence
They two would get mentally disturbed. Do this by telling it to everyone. I wonder how they suffer. The reason I uses a two-timing guy instead of a girl in this situation is to let some of you know this had nothing to do with my personal life or in reference to my last betrayal filled relationship.

There are many more reasons why cursing is actually good to me. I just got to avoid this long post from becoming a novel. In a nutshell, curse more and you end up happier with no retards will bother your work, able to convince ppl successfully, able to converse better and could let ppl know you are not easily bullied. How about you guys try to comment and list out several reasons why cursing is good/bad. Signing off. To those who disagree to my point, I'm so sorry to offend you but fuck you. XD

P.S: Although there are a lot of advantages for me in cursing, I still felt cursing towards respected people are way low-life. Cursing should be a form of art properly used. If you do not know how to use them, it just shows you are rude and stupid.

17 comments:

Anonymous said...

how if a girl keep cursing whole day and night?

cursing seem a normal phenomenon for guys,some how is still a weird if happen to a girl...or someday your gf?

anyway,i do agree with wat u stated~

Unknown said...

wow....I haven't announce it and I already have a commenter...although I wish you would not remain anonymous

To me, I'm not gender biased...If it's ok for guys to swear, why not girls. Swearing whole day and night does it mean in a right way or the stupid way? Some people just swear without knowing how to properly use them..I think it is dumb for both guys and girls to swear whole day and night without having using them correctly...It is true that the society are a bit unfair towards this issues and I seriously look down on guys who swears a lot but hate it when a girl swears...

Even if my gf swear, I would not mind as long as she do not do it to my parents...Moreover, I think that girls that swears correctly are more open minded in accepting opinion and giving them...they should be cool to hang out with...western girls swear but why do we don't mind it? I bet Megan Fox swears and every guy still wants her as a gf....Cursing doesn't entirely reflects the person as rude as widely misinterpret by many...Hope that answers your curiosity regarding my views on girls that curse...hope u will reply..

Ken Wooi said...

guys cursing.. OK..
girls curing.. KO! =P

kenwooi.com

Unknown said...

LOL...yeah...facts of life...but not to me

Unknown said...

hahahahaha! yeah that's the way to curse! curse is a must but if the guy just curse out loud but no balls to act, he's just a fucking lame!

Anonymous said...

followers here ^^

hurray~agree with u ! society should gv a fair to girl~~if a guy can do so,why not girls?haha~

yet,we being teach to be polite since we are child...me?hrm...better to keep a polite image to everyone!=P
if the situation is force to be...i will say;SHIT! lolz~

-alice angle-1SRI- ^^

Unknown said...

nesca: hahaha dude, i totally agree to that...I knew several ppl like that

alice: you are the one who comment earlier? haha didn't expect my 1SRI juniors to read my blog...thanks..u ah? U already look like a small girl la...I don't expect you to curse also...hahahaha

Jennifer Chai said...

very true as sometimes when we were pissed by someone or something, and I guess FUCK is the best vocab that I could ever use! Any other word to replace?

*Or should I say without the foul words, I could hardly express myself hehe

Unknown said...

Hamsap Lady: I guess you would not mind me referring you to this right? LOL I guess KNNBCCB and FUCK is the God of ALL foul words...hahaha vulgarity is such an art...

conan_cat said...

wahahahaha!!! i totally love this post man! xD i love how you give the situations and guides on how to swear xD

well being too much of a good boy myself i rarely swear for my own good, lol. i started swearing lately but whenever i do, people around me will say "hey, no no no!" they're all too good boy and girls, just like me!

though silently i will still "tiu" and "fuck" whenever i get stressed in the office xD

Unknown said...

Grey: Good boy? You should mix around with me then...hahaha the feel of saying fuck silently and loudly are sooo different...lol well...it's good not being able to curse....means the society is not as corrupted as me...haha

donna said...

if u read my blog then you'll know i am belong to which category already.. wtf..

Unknown said...

donna: hahaha donna, i love your personality to be honest....a girl that actually curse correctly...hahaha respect...

Gratitude said...

hahaha Donna is so pleased (as are we) to know her wtf swears are the norm.

Thanks for this post, highly entertaining.
+Ant+

Unknown said...

AnT: I guess I gonna thank donna for spreading my blog...lol...to tell the truth, there are more people who swear rather than not...if everyone's complaining swearing is bad, then they didn't notice the world already infested dee...haha

Zhi Kang said...

Ahhh.....such enlightening post on the art of the swearing, my old friend......I can feel the holiness in it........I can truly feel the ecstasy when conjuring words like Fuck, KNN, KNS, MCB.. #$*&^
......Hmm....swearing is such an unbelievable beautiful work of art (surpassing Leonardo Da Vinci's artwork in conveying feeling and adored by majority)!! (maybe I should give up drawing and take up swearing?)

WAIT!!......

Maybe I should continue to be a wolf wearing a sheep's skin???
...........Ahhh....the art of luring in others and eat 'em up when they are not expecting it
.....Hmmm....

Hard decision to make indeed.....

Oh Fu*!!!! I mean Flower!!! Nobody heard anything right??? I'm a good boy.....Yes, believe me, I'm a good boy.......

=)

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